After a breakup, would you return an expensive gift your ex gave you?

MISUNDERSTANDINGS happen in relationships. It is a given and while it is always hoped that misunderstandings can be resolved, some eventually lead to a breakup. In the case where a relationship fails on the ground of misunderstandings and people who used to care deeply about each other become cold towards one another, it begs the question of what happens to all the gifts they had given each other.

To understand people’s thought towards the question, WhatsApp conversation this week engaged the audience with the topic: ‘After a breakup, would you return an expensive gift your ex got you?’

 

Here are the answers:

DuroJaye Philip

If a breakup should happen, except she demands those gifts she gave to me, I don’t see any reason why I should return the gift. I believe that the gifts were given to me on a good note at a time when the relationship was mutual. If she makes a demand for it, I will freely give it back but if not, I will not give back the gifts.

 

Gbemisola Osunbayo

I can’t, even if my ex requested, I can’t. It is tagged ‘gift, and since he presented it himself, the gift is now rightfully mine. Regardless of how things ended between us, he cannot get those gifts back; it’s as simple as that.

 

Jectives Femi

In my opinion; either expensive or not, I deem it unnecessary to return a gift to your ex. No matter how the relationship turned out to be, they were once part of your life. Maybe give it out if you don’t want it anymore but return? That’s low.

 

Dunsin Grace

In every reasonable sense, a gift is a gift and it is assumed, it was born out of a voluntary action or reasoning. So if you gave me as a gift, it is only right that you forget about it, Afterall, it is a gift. It is left for me to decide what to do with it. In any case after a breakup, except my ex in question demands for it, hell no! I am keeping my gift plus the good memories. If he now demands for it, I will give it to him plus something extra to compensate the effort he used to ask.

 

Igbe Chituru

When I was in secondary school, I returned the wristwatch an ex got for me, gave it to his sister. That was then and that was the level of knowledge I had. I dashed out shirts an ex got for me, gave it to my cousins. Currently, it depends on my emotional state at that particular time. If it is a recent separation, I am not going to give back the gift, I act on impulse sometimes.

 

Lanre Oseni

Returning the precious gift by an ex-partner: I will count it as a lifelong and a forever gift if our relationship did not end sour before we parted. Even if it ended sour, the earlier gift would be regarded as “one of those things” in life. It remains a take – away in my mind and wishes us “all the best”! Asking for a return to me is a sign of a “ masculine weakness”. Togetherness has come and gone; gifts had come and gone too.

 

Josephine Idowu

All old things are passed away, in this day and age, if you gift me something expensive, I believe you were not unconscious when you made the decision. I am definitely not going to return it. Even if you ask for it, I can’t return it and if I find it emotionally draining, I will sell it and do cash giveaway with the proceed.

 

Emmanuel Adeniji

I can’t return a gift neither can I collect mine back, the gifts were shared when it was worth it and that we are separating doesn’t mean we should strip each other naked. We meet to part and we part to meet, so when we meet again, we can be able to say hello.

 

Khadeejah Rayeat

I think it is immature to return gifts given to me by my ex. It was a gift, not a loan.

I cannot possibly imagine returning any gift that my ex gave to me. Even if it’s the most expensive gift in the world. The mere fact that it is tagged gift is enough to show the effect.

 

Adebisi Taiwo

I can’t collect something I can’t afford, and I will always find a way to gift him something of equal value or more than. That way, if he wants to count bullshit, I will count two times for him.

In a normal relationship where giving is mutual, you do not need a calculator. God should not allow us to enter into a relationship that will be counting each morsel.

 

Expert speaks

Mr. Tukur Jamo is a graduate of Political science, he is interested in legalities within relationships and he is also a public affairs analyst, here is his take on the issue:

Once a break up happens, the only legally binding transactions between the parties who used to be in a relationship are things that are duly recorded. Those are transactions that have evidence. Gifts, in this case, are not transactional in nature. Gifts are given out of the benevolence of one’s heart and no one is compelled to give gifts.

As such, to request the giving back of such gifts would be to go back on one’s goodness. If you had extended a loan to the other party in the relationship, it is a different case. You can even choose to be legal about that, we say the case of the ex-boyfriend to the customs boss wife. The only reason he could sue was that there was documentation and the other party was aware that it was a loan.

 

Next week on WhatsApp conversation, we will be considering the series Conversations you must have in your relationships. It promises to be an enlightening series.

 

YOU SHOULD NOT MISS THESE HEADLINES FROM NIGERIAN TRIBUNE

Buy and read digital replicas of your TRIBUNE titles by subscribing through E-VENDING

President Buhari’s Full Democracy Day Speech
Fellow Nigerians,The 2020 celebration of Democracy Day marks 21 years of uninterrupted civil administration in our dear country. This day provides us an opportunity to reflect on our journey as a nation, our achievements and struggles.
It is a day to honour our founding fathers who toiled to establish our republic and every Nigerian who has worked tirelessly to sustain it… Read full story

Democracy Day: NADECO lists 12 conditions to unity, peace •Insists on return to federalism
TWENTY-ONE years after it led the struggle that culminated in the restoration of civil rule, the National Democratic Coalition (NADECO) on Thursday declared that Nigeria remained in dire straits. Accordingly, it listed about 12 fundamental conditions, including a return to federalism, coupled with the convocation… Read full story

Governance: Our best not good enough since 1999 —Atiku
EFFORTS by Nigerian leaders to govern the country rightly since 1999 have not been “good enough to improve on the lives of the citizenry and grow the nation in all facets of development needs,” former vice president, Alhaji Atiku Abubakar, has said… Read full story

ASUU Challenges FG To Provide Proofs It Saved Money Through IPPIS
The Academic Staff Union of Universities (ASUU) has again challenged the Federal Government to present to the public a verifiable proof that it has saved huge amounts of money through its newly introduced Integrated Personnel and Payroll Information System (IPPIS) for workers… Read full story

Reps Increase 2020 Budget From N10.805trn To N10.810trn
The House of Representatives on Thursday passed a resolution to increase the revised 2020 budget from N10.806 trillion to N10.810 trillion. The resolution was passed after the adoption of a debate on the motion sponsored by the chairman, House Committee on Finance, Hon Abiodun Faleke, who underscored… Read full story

COVID-19: Reject Patients, Have Your License Withdrawn, FG Threatens Medical Doctors
The Federal Government on Thursday threatened to withdraw licenses of medical doctors who deliberately reject and turn back patients from their hospital without attending to them or offering necessary advice on what to do. Describing it as unethical and unacceptable, the Minister of Health, Dr Osagie Ehanire, while speaking… Read full story

Reopen Schools For SS3 Students First, Proprietor Tells FG, WAEC
A school administrator and principal of Adesina College, Ibadan, Mr Adejare Adesina, has advised the Federal Government to liaise with the West African Examination Council (WAEC) and other West African countries that subscribe to the council’s examinations to reopen schools for all the Senior… Read full story

COVID-19 Lockdowns Deny 500m Children Access To Education ― IMF
Over 500 million children all over the world have lost access to education as a result of the lockdown occasioned by the COVID-19 pandemic, the International Monetary Fund (IMF) said on Thursday. The IMF Managing Director, Kristalina Georgieva, said in a statement that “More than half a billion children worldwide have… Read full story

Nigeria Is 3rd Worst Country On Child Marriage Index
United Nations Children Fund (UNICEF) has said that with a figure of 3.5 million, Nigeria has the third-highest absolute number of child brides in the world and the 11th highest prevalence rate of child marriage globally. Tribune Online reports that only Bangladesh with 4.4 million and India with 15.5 million child brides are… Read full story

Anxiety Over More Deaths, Rising Cases Of COVID-19 In Nigeria
THE geometric rise in the number of confirmed cases of COVID-19 and the increasing casualties arising from the infection have continued to raise concerns among Nigerians. The deadly virus is still running riot despite concerted efforts to curtail it, crippling many facets of the economy as it passes the first 100 days of… Read full story

Senate Threatens To Issue Warrant Of Arrest On Heads Of MDAs
The Senate has threatened to issue warrants of arrest on some ministries department and agencies of government over failure to appear before it and respond to queries by the Auditor General of the Federation. Tribune Online reports that the threat follows the refusal of the agencies of government to honour the invitation of… Read full story

June 12: A Milestone For Democracy – Tinubu
The election of June 12th 1993 changed Nigeria profoundly. That it would have this deep and positive effect was not always certain. Many people laboured, struggled and sacrificed for democracy. They fought not that we would have democracy day but that Nigeria might exist as a democracy every day. When I say democracy… Read full story

EDITORIAL: Defence Minister’s Lamentation
THE Minister of Defence, Bashir Magashi, has lamented that Nigeria’s military is too understaffed and underfunded to tackle the various security challenges facing the country. He made this lamentation while briefing journalists after a Federal Executive Council (FEC) meeting where he said he had made a presentation on… Read full story

You might also like
Comments

This website uses cookies to improve your experience. We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish. AcceptRead More