It is generally believed that a woman should be able to have sex six weeks after childbirth. This, however, does not mean she wants sex; it just means that the woman’s body will not explode if you have sex at that time. Sincerely, sex after childbirth could be a big task. This is because she still looks and feels pregnant. But sex can actually be painful.
There are certain reasons sex hurts after childbirth; these are:
Extra stitches. If you had a vaginal birth and tore naturally or the doctor cut the perineum; the space between the vagina and the anus and you were stitched up, especially the last stitch. This is an extra, unnecessary stitch at the perineum that is supposed to make your vaginal opening smaller. Sometimes women ask for this, most of the time they don’t. This can cause pain with sex. It is not that the stitch does not heal correctly; it is that your vagina is smaller.
Required stitches. If you needed stitches because you had a tear, these stitches will heal well. But sometimes they can leave you with scar tissue at the perineum. This can be really problematic with sex because scar tissue makes everything tighter and more sensitive. It can make your muscles in your vagina way too tense when they are supposed to be relaxing.
Natural tearing. This is the same thing as the second point. Even with natural tearing you are going to have some scar tissue. If you don’t work through this scar tissue and massage it and knead it, then it can create painful sex.
Breastfeeding, dryness and low libido. Breastfeeding can lower your natural hormone levels inside and outside the vagina making sex dry and lowering your sex drive. But if you don’t have sex drive, your vagina will not get wet. When your vagina doesn’t get wet enough, there is friction and this feels like sandpaper and tearing. You must make use of lubricant. The most gentle lubricants for painful sex are coconut oil and olive oil or something water-based ones.
Sex and worrying about the baby waking or being in the room. The pelvic floor, the support muscles in the pelvis that keep up all your organs and span from all around your vagina and clitoris to all around your anus and from one hip to the other, basically responds to what we’re thinking. They are mind readers. When you are scared, nervous, anxious or uncomfortable, your pelvic floor muscles will automatically respond and tense up. This makes your vagina and your anus smaller that moment. It is a really primitive response. It is the body’s old-fashioned way of trying to protect your reproductive. You really should have sex when the timing is right for your mind. When your brain is more relaxed, your vagina is more relaxed.
Cesarean -section. Just like the stitch scenario, cesarean-sections leave scars. If you don’t work this scar, the scar tissue will grow down into the layers beneath it and really create problems. This can cause bladder problems, bowel problems and of course painful sex.
Attempted vaginal delivery and a c-section. You might have perineal tearing and a cesarean-section scar. You have got a lot of reasons why sex could hurt, so work the scars in both places to minimise and eliminate the problem.