Pastor (Mrs) Jumoke Oluwakayode is the wife of Pastor Caleb Oluwakayode of Revelation of Christ Chapel, Bolumole, Challenge, Ibadan, Oyo State. In this interview by OLAIDE SOKOYA, she speaks on her growing up, 11-year experience in marriage, and her advice for pastors’ wives on supporting their husbands in ministry. Excerpts:
You are a nurse, a mother, and also a wife to a pastor. How do you combine all these without clash?
Though it is not easy but God is helping me. I always schedule my work so that I can handle tasks with ease.
How did you meet your husband?
My mum and his mum were close friends, but we weren’t on talking terms as a result of the age gap between us. Later, he lost his dad and my mum, who wasn’t around at the time, asked me to represent her at the funeral. It was during a rainy season. That day, it rained heavily and by the time I got to the place, I was drenched and shivering. He saw me from a distance, came to me, greeted me and gave me his coat to wear. I couldn’t stay long at the event because of my wet clothes, so I left with the coat. The following day, I called him to thank him and asked how I would return his coat, and so our friendship began. And during that period, I was praying to God to give me a husband and God revealed to me that he is my husband. I could not believe it, because we hadn’t really spoken to each other before then, and I am older than him with two years. I met my pastor and he also confirmed it that he is my husband. We dated and got married.
What are the challenges you have faced and how have you been able to overcome them?
There have been a lot of challenges in various aspects of our marriage but with the help of God, we have been able to overcome. I faced a lot of challenges during our early years of marriage, financially, but God has been faithful.
As a nurse, what is your view on children sexually molested by older men?
I can boldly say that it is an evil act. It is the work of the devil because this act is rampant nowadays, not only in Nigeria. Parents need to pray for our children and also impact the word of God on them. When we do that, they will be able to rely on that word and they will know where they are coming from.
What age do you think parents can educate their children on sex?
Immediately they know how to identify things; at very tender age. We must not wait for them to grow up or get admission into tertiary institutions before we start teaching them. Then, it will be too late. If we don’t teach them at home, someone else will teach them outside and they will teach them the wrong things.
What is your advice for women facing challenges in their homes and considering divorce?
I want to urge all women to endure challenges faced in their marriages for the sake of their children. There is no family without challenges. The challenge only varies from one to another. Even Jesus Christ said he hates divorce. Also, men should love their wives. When there is love in the family, there will be no talk of divorce.
How do you relax?
I relax by reading the Bible; I pray and also watch Christian movies.
How do you create time for your husband?
That is my first assignment and my first ministry. Out of no time, I need to create time for him. It is very important and compulsory.
As a woman, how do you feel seeing ladies in provocative dresses?
There is a saying that, “If you don’t train them, don’t blame them.” If you see any lady wearing a provocative dress, trace her back home to see her parents, especially, her mother. That is why we (mothers) have a great job to do.
What attire are you comfortable in?
I love English outfits, especially suits.
What item can you not do without when dressing up?
My wristwatch and my wedding ring.
What item won’t you be caught dead with?
Jewelry.